taking a chance...

I’m judging myself right now, knowing that I potentially broke my resolution on something that was so NOT worth breaking it for… but a girl has to take a chance every now and again…

If I haven’t mentioned before I have the most adorable nephews in the world. Not being biased, they literally are so cute I pinch them- not hard don’t worry! These two men are my #1’s. I love every minute I get with them, even if my car is left with french fries jammed in the seat, and dusty little foot prints all over the place. They are the greatest two human beings in my life, and I am eternally grateful for having a sister that lets me spoil them rotten and take them whenever I need some quality bonding time. It was on one of our little adventures that I encountered Parking Lot man.  

So, my two little men and I head out to grab a few things, with the youngest being 2, I walked across a crowded and busy parking lot with a baby on my hip and the other holding my hand. We grab our things and while walking through the store I happen to notice a guy watching us. It’s important to point out that because my nephews are so adorable people often comment on how cute they are. So I just assumed he also thought that of the two of them running down the isles. Yes aunty lets them as long as they aren’t screaming!  I continued picking up what I needed, we paid for our items and left. After buckling both the boys in I turned to get in the driver seat when I hear behind me, “excuse me, but are those your kids?” 

At this point I think maybe this guy is the dad of a kid from play dates my nephew goes on? I really had no idea, so I turned around, explained that they were my nephews and we were just out for the day. I didn’t need someone thinking I had stolen these two angels.

It was after my explanation that he proceeded to say, he didn’t think I looked old enough to have two children (little does he know) but that I looked incredible with children, and he proceeded to ask for my number.

Here I stand in the middle of a parking lot with a reasonably attractive man asking for my number after basically having just told me I look like a hot mom. I was honestly a little dumb founded, did men actually approach women with children to ask if a- those were her children and b- if she was single and they could have her number?

It’s also critical that at this point I share what the man looked like.

He was wearing a ball cap, with a 5’oclock shadow, zipped up sweater (green) and jeans with running shoes. He for all inspection looked like your average Joe.

So, I threw caution to the wind and instead of giving him my number, I took his and told him that if I had time while I was in town I’d let him know.

Well after my adventure with the boys wrapped up, I thought you know what I’m going to just take a chance. So I asked him to meet me for coffee later the afternoon before I left town. Now remember how I described him before, looking like the average Joe.

Well, this time when he got out of his vehicle to meet me for coffee, he stepped out in a tee shirt that revealed not only were his arms covered in tattoos, but they were also crawling up his neck.

 – please note I don’t have a problem with tattoos, got one of my own that I love.

He was also wearing a flashy graphic tee shirt, jeans and those shoes with the weird toe that curls up (think elf like dress shoes). Now the only reason why I make note of what he was wearing was because I hadn’t changed since being out earlier in the day – firm believer in what you see is what you get. So I didn’t know if he was trying to hard, or if he had another date lined up for after coffee. The wardrobe change seemed so odd, and he looked like a different person, totally threw me for a loop.

Now to the date, I’m going to fast track most of it and just share the basics, and the main reasons why I didn’t ever want to see him again.

We sat and talked for an hour about what we did for fun, our careers, and family and just general first date topics.

I quickly realized he wasn’t a match for me when these words came out of his mouth

“I wish I was into bigger girls, because they are so much nicer and would be really excited to have someone like me be interested in them”

- that comment almost warranted throwing my extra hot non fat chai latte in his face.

For several reasons this ended it, there was no digging his way out of it. Sure I might have taken it in the worst way possible. But I don’t think anyone should be judged or stereo typed in that regard. He was being rude and offensive to girls of every size with that comment.

He proceeded to tell me he didn’t like girls who went out all the time, but that he spends his spare time sitting in the pub watching sports. – marginally hypocritical?

That he was looking for someone who would txt or call him every night just to say goodnight? – you’re a grown man are you  kidding me?

The list of comments continues, but in there he also threw out how he had been looking for a country girl just like me, someone down to earth – I know a line when I hear it, he called living in the country boring not 3 minutes before that.

But the two things that sealed it for me were the fact when we were walking away he made the comment. That next weekend I would be going for supper with him, and he would be seeing me again. – don’t tell ME what I will and wont be doing, seriously I’m 24 and the only man who will ever tell me what to do is my father.

Finally something I couldn’t swallow and after this information was processed in my brain I knew he was NOT someone I’d ever be spending time with again. He shared with me that he had a 7 year old daughter he hasn’t seen in years. I’m not privy to all details, but if I was a parent regardless of circumstances I would be part of my child’s life and nothing would stop that. And that his mom was at home battling cancer and he hadn’t been to see her since her diagnosis. Distance would never stop me from being with anyone I cared about if they were sick.

So, the fact he didn’t value his family the way I do mine, along with the ever charming lines he kept spewing out of his mouth, I knew this would never work. Regardless of the fact he thought I looked like a hot mom, and flattered me non stop, I just couldn’t imagine ever spending time with Parking Lot man.

Well there you have it my Sweets, my rule bending date with Parking Lot man. I hesitate to say I broke my resolution, especially because this date was so not good. I had to share this story with you, so you could see not all my dates are exciting, fun or even enjoyable.

The take home from this one my Sweets is that, sometimes you need to take chances, but never be willing to compromise on your own values or what you feel to be right. Be yourself it’s that simple.

Next up is match making attempt # 4. It makes me smile just thinking about it. Get ready, because I think your really going to like this one!

xoxo

a little more...

So here is the deal…

I had this notion of keeping my blog anonymous, in a word so full of everyone displaying every part of their lives on the internet.

(everyone wants to see what you’re eating with an instagram shot!- insert eye roll!)

I thought; why not keep this a secret part of my life. Let those who read enjoy my stories but not really know much about me.  – also my future career plans include a lot of public appearances so I thought I better keep this as politically sounds, and as friendly to the public as possible… yes that’s right I plan on total world domination within the next 12 years!

But then I realized the blogs I follow are ones who are written by people I find truly amazing, sweet, or unique and wish they were my friends in real life. So I’ve decided to give you a little snippet about me, the girl behind all these kooky stories, trying to navigate her way through the single life in a couple’s world.

or more like a world that praises man whores… but anyway

I am a self proclaimed refined hick, a polished country girl. I make my living working in the city, but my life is in the country.  This blog came from hours of conversation with my girlfriends about my dating life and sometimes lack thereof. It didn’t matter if they were single, coupled up, or married, they all said the same thing. “why does all of this happen to you, you ought to write a book about it” well that my Sweets would take years, and frankly this is a little funnier. I will never give anyone’s real names out because I have too much respect for other people’s integrity as well as my own. So you will get to giggle at my stories and never know who the person really is.

I must admit, sometimes when writing I feel like a totally quack… even right now I’m talking to myself about myself. - people seek medical attention for that sort of thing.

 However a friend assured me and encourages me that this whole process will probably help me make smarter dating decisions. I pray he is right!

If you’ve been following along you know that my resolution was to only go on dates with people “pre-approved” by my friends.  It’s going wonderfully so far… I smile saying that – yup there is a juicy 2 date story coming up! I am however also sharing stories from my past because they have been the most delicious to share.

With that being said, my life aside from work has now been consumed by training for my first half marathon, and I seem to have found a knack for spending hours catching up with friends (highly recommend this!) along with finding any reason to take a weekend trip away. So at times it looks like I don’t love my blog, but I do. It will also never be a fancy blog with all those gadgets on the side. What you see is what you get. SIMPLE !

There you have it my Sweets, if you have questions you want answered let me know.

xoxo

a chance meeting... twice?

Far too long…

I honestly wish I had a great excuse for why its been so long since my last post, but I don’t. My life is busy just like everyone else’s, and I have let my posts go totally unmade. It’s a good thing I have such AMAZING friends who still encourage (push) me to do this! I think they are just hoping and waiting for a truly horrific or heartwarming story to read… Yay for both to come!!!

Yes its true, things happen in the blink of an eye and a girl tends to find herself in situations you wouldn’t even dream up… or at least I do…

My Pre Vacay date… the one in which I am claiming to have not broken my resolution on!

You see, when you already knew of the person and at one time had each other’s numbers, exchanging them again 5 years later doesn’t count as a random exchange of numbers… therefore I wasn’t breaking my resolution to only go on dates with people pre-approved by my friends… right?

Well it doesn’t much matter anyway, here is the date I neglected to tell you all about a month ago – it actually happened two months ago… oops

Tall, Dark, Handsome and can two step. What country girl wouldn’t be immediately swooning over a boy like that??!! Just to clarify, he also had light colored eyes and great teeth.

We had met several years ago at a local rodeo dance and exchanged numbers after dancing several times. I was moving away, he was a young foolish boy (some things don’t change with age) and nothing every came from it.

Flash forward 5 years later and while in a daze at another rodeo dance someone grabs my arm, I whip around and it’s him… again. He looks more manly but still just as cute. We have a brief encounter and he is gone again.

 Its important to note that after several beverages I felt more courageous and inclined to pursue him. So, being the resourceful girl I am, find him on facebook (danger lurks in facebook!) and send him a message. (at 4AM… clearly some logical thinking)

Anyway, I left my number in the message – one I reread the next morning and shook my head wondering what the heck I was thinking. The message worked, cause he called the next day.

We continued to chat for several days; he then asked to meet me for supper. I was helping out my incredible girlfriend at the time, so was being the responsible adult in the house for her two teenage sons, so told him I only had time for a quick drink.

We met, chatted, it was really fun. We had a lot of critical things in common, and I really enjoyed the date.

When we left we had the most awkward exchange of a hug in my life.

(think an extended handshake that wrapped around your mid-section... awkward right ?) 

It was like he wanted to, but was scared and it ended up feeling incredibly strange and I had this very weird feeling after.

He followed up by txting me the next day and it seemed like things were on its natural course. I was off to Mexico the day after so things were left up in the air…

When I got home a week later it was like it never happened, he was all standoffish and acting like a precious little gem.

*** Please insert the most sarcastic tone ever as you say those three words, and accompany them with an eye roll… you get it now?

 In true to me fashion, I have left it completely alone… with the exception of letting him remain a facebook contact. Men are visual creatures, they see something they like they go after it…

It might be presumptuous of me to say but keeping these “not so lucky” men as a contact is really more for my gratification than anything else, because I continue to do my own thing, being the strong independent women I am. Hoping, and slightly knowing it bothers them to see I didn’t even blink an eye over them no longer being interested in me, because I know there will be someone who will fit just perfectly and they will be the lucky one!

There you have it, the date that happened mere hours prior to my sunny beach vacation.

I have since had two more dates... so stay tuned for one youll giggle about and one you'll wish you had been on!!

Till then my Sweets

xoxo